Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
