I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
