Swine flu. Run for my life!
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
