I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
