I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
