why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
