I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
These tits shall not be calmed
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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