is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
