at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
