Buhtt sex?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
