I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
