Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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