the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize