Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
