that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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