Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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