oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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