He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
