I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
