Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
