I wanna passion pit in your ass
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
