My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
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