Im at strip club and am horny
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
