Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
