okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
operation harelip BJ is a go
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
