I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
