what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Randomize
