Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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