we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
