Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
