He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize