Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
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