don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
