on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
