You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
