i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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