She announced her abortion via fbk
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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