So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
