nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
