the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
