dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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