bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
