Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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