we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
