He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
