remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
