White coat. Heels.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
