I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
