Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize
