I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize